INSPIRE: Rejection, maybe..

Job searching has a habit of making us judge moments too quickly.

You don't get shortlisted. You don't receive an interview. You come second. The role goes to someone else.

It feels like failure.

Maybe.

There's an ancient Chinese parable about an old man whose horse ran away. His neighbours called it bad luck. He simply replied, "Maybe." The horse later returned with another wild horse. Good luck, they said. "Maybe." His son was then thrown from the horse and broke his leg. Bad luck. "Maybe." Soon after, war broke out and every able-bodied young man was called to fight. His son stayed home and survived.

The lesson is simple: we rarely know what today's disappointment will become tomorrow.

I've seen candidates devastated after missing out on a role, only to find themselves months later in a position that suited them far better. Equally, I've seen candidates land what they thought was their dream job, only to realise it wasn't the right fit after all.

In my own career, I experienced this. 

I went for a job interview for a role that I really wanted so badly. I prepared like I had never prepared before, even making a presentation that the panel didn’t even ask for (which I sort of insisted I present much to the dismay of the board!) I poured my heart out, I gave my soul but it didn’t work. The interview wasn’t great and I knew I hadn’t got it as I walked out, went across the road and ordered a pint. 

They decided I wasn’t the person for them and to be honest I did lack the big gift experience they were looking for. I was devastated. Not only because I wanted the role so much but also I needed a regular income. 

Two weeks later I came across another opportunity which was even more perfect. An actual dream job. I prepared with equal gusto, created a compelling, thoughtful and creative presentation (that they asked for!) and got a call the next morning saying I got it. It was less money than the other role but would nourish me more and was a Head of Fundraising role, so on balance was a better opportunity all round. 

Rejection hurts, but it doesn't always tell the whole story.

That doesn't mean you simply move on without reflection. Every rejection is an opportunity to learn.

During that episode I learnt that I should listen to the panel and partake in a process that they had established, and not to force a presentation upon them. My stubbornness and arrogance perhaps painted me in a light that caused concern for the hiring team. I also learnt that missing out on an opportunity is ok, as there will be more. 

Where possible, ask for honest feedback. Not generic comments, but clear, specific examples. Was your experience too narrow? Did another candidate demonstrate stronger leadership? Were your interview examples lacking detail? Whatever the answer, listen without becoming defensive.

Then act on it.

If you need broader experience, find ways to gain it. If your interview technique needs strengthening, practise it. If your CV isn't telling your story clearly enough, rewrite it. Treat every rejection as information that improves your approach to the next opportunity.

But there's another question worth asking.

How disappointed were you?

If the rejection genuinely hurts, it's often because the role mattered. That tells you something valuable about your motivation.

If, however, you barely feel anything, pause before submitting your next application. Was this ever a role you truly wanted, or were you simply applying because it was available? Go back to your whys. Has your career why become disconnected from your cause why? Are you pursuing opportunities with intention, or just hoping that something sticks?

Sometimes rejection isn't redirecting your career.

Sometimes it's revealing that you were walking down the wrong path in the first place.

The aim isn't to avoid rejection—that's impossible. The aim is to make sure every rejection leaves you better prepared, more self-aware and closer to the role that genuinely fits.

So the next time an email begins, "Unfortunately...", allow yourself to feel disappointed.

Then remember the old man's response.

"Maybe."

Because the story of your career isn't written by a single rejection. It's written by what you choose to do next.